One way to do this is to make a checklist of who is responsible for what. Sit and decide with your child which responsibilities she’s ready to handle on her own. (If parents are reminding and nagging about a responsibility—or doing it sometimes for their child—they are still assuming that responsibility.)

Agree on rewards for a job well done, and penalties for when your child shirks responsibility.

Here is a starter list you can adapt:

Sample Checklist

School:

• Getting up on time
• Choice of clothing
• Lunch money
• Getting to the bus on time
• Homework
• Tests
• Return of signed forms
• Grades
• Choice of school friends

Home:

• Sibling conflicts
• Keeping room clean
• Fixing breakfast
• Completing assigned chores
• Getting to bed on time
• Personal hygiene
• Feeding/caring for pets

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