Instead, she says, "a parent is for making leaning unnecessary."

Children who are constantly bailed out of trouble never learn what they can . . . or can't do. And they never gain the self-confidence that comes from overcoming problems.

If you constantly do things for your child, you may be sending him a message. He may think, "Mom and Dad must not think I can handle this myself." As your child begins to doubt his own abilities, he may give up trying. He will turn to you for help in everything.

Here are some says you can encourage your child to stop leaning on you:

• Make your child responsible for preparing his own lunch. A bonus—he'll be more likely to eat what he's chosen himself.
• Let your child see the results of his actions. If he misses the bus, he walks (if it's safe). If he forgets his assignment at home, he must face the consequences.
• Teach your child the skills he'll need to survive in life. As he grows older, he can learn to wash clothes, to prepare a simple meal, to balance a checkbook, or to change a tire.
• Expect your child to do at least one thing daily for the good of the family.

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