Use this list to see if you’re helping your child develop into a self-manager. Self-managers:

• Do things for reasons other than getting another person’s approval or reaction. They act out of a desire to learn, do or finish something, for instance.

• Understand cause and effect. They can connect their behavior to the consequences of their behavior.

• Accept the consequences of their bad choices. They don’t blame others.

• Know how to make good decisions. They define a problem or opportunity. They consider alternatives, then select the best solution.

• Are less vulnerable to peer pressure. They care about what others think, feel and need. But they make decisions based on what they think is best, even if their friends disagree.

• Take the initiative. They don’t wait for parents or teachers to nag them. They act without threat or promise of reward.

• Resolve conflict without aggression. They seek win-win solutions.

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