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More on Choosing Teachers

The term "helicopter parent" came to mind when I read the Hawaii Reporter article that Tim mentioned in his June 6 post about parents lobbying for next year's classroom placements. Helicopter parents are so named because they hover above their children at all times, ready to swoop down and perform heroic rescues should their little dears stub a toe or get a grumpy teacher.

College administrators began using the phrase several years ago after noticing that parents were so used to managing every aspect of their children's lives, they couldn't let go once their kids entered college. (It's time to land the helicopter and get a hobby when you find yourself pulling an all-nighter to write your college sophomore's term paper, then calling the professor to dispute the grade).

OK. So trying to influence which teacher your child gets in elementary school isn't the same as following the kid to college and moving into the dorm. But try to begin the process with the assumption that all of the teachers are equally qualified and the people making the placements have a pretty good idea where your child will best fit in. Then you can weigh in with your thoughts talk with the decision makers about your child's personality and how he learns best. Describe the sort of classroom environment where he's likely to thrive. But that's about as far as I'd go.

Now I must confess that this year I went one tiny step further. I asked that my son be placed with a certain friend. My son has been with the same group of 13 children since kindergarten. This fall when the kids go into 4th grade, they'll be split up and mixed in with other students for the first time. When I think of my child in a large class half-filled with people he doesn't know, I go into mild shock. Placing my son with his friend is for me, anyway a medical necessity.

When I asked his teacher to put the two together, she pulled out a class list in progress and pointed to two names. "I already did," she said. I knew I could trust her judgment.
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#1 Amanda 2008-09-19 21:02
I suppose you would call me a "helicopter mom." But honestly, I feel that it is my job to make sure that my children get the best of what I can help provide for them. Therefore, when this school year began, I was first to sign up for volunteer. Unfortunately, regardless of the .sign up sheet, my daughters teacher refuses to take any volunteers. When I have tried discussing this issue with her, or any other, all I have found is rudeness and inability to communicate with me in a positive way. I have seen her be rude to students as well. My daughter, who is actually quite shy, got a note sent home on the 2nd day of school saying that she was sent to "yellow light" for talking in the hallway. The next day, she was so scared she would get into trouble that she peed her pants instead of asking to use the restroom. At this point, I am wondering what to do. I would love to have her switch teachers, but I don't want to be that parent. I want to form a relationship with this woman because she is helping to mold who my child is. She spends more time with my daughter than I do day-by-day. I feel that I should have some say as to who spends the entire day with my daughter. If the teacher is unapproachable, do I go to the principle? Do I try to have a sit down with her? I am just downright frustrated. I guess I totally disagree with the idea that all teachers are equally qualified.

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