My Child’s IEP is Bigger Than Your 10 Pounds

Imagine you’re having lunch with a couple of friends who are talking about weight loss…

And you jump in and mention that you’re still trying to lose those last 10 pounds of “baby weight” (okay my “baby” is 7 years old), and they collectively sneer at you? It seems your 10 pounds counts less than their pounds. But no less ideal is your ideal weight, is it?

Sometimes I get this same disdain when I attempt to describe my kids’ behavioral issues, or school related problems. When I talk about my 5th grade daughter’s frustration due to boredom in the classroom, the response often is pooh-poohed.

“My child’s issues trump yours by 10x!” is the annoyed response I get from them. They aren’t willing to listen to the concerns that might arise with a child who overall excels at school, yet still has specific difficulties, albeit small. It’s like they think I’m not worthy of getting to my ideal weight, nor is my daughter worthy of additional help in areas where she may genuinely need the help.

I’m not trying to compare child problems or gauge whose child struggles more. And certainly I’m not judging anyone! I’m simply in need of sharing a current parenting/school frustration at the collective mommy water-cooler.

Before you compare your child’s problems to another parent’s child’s problems, walk a few steps on their treadmill!

Believe me I’m well aware of the energy and effort required as the parent of a child with mild to severe learning differences.

  • I’ve spent a lot of time listening to other moms explain the pain they feel as they watch their child struggle with learning disabilities or ADHD or even a grade school bully.
  • I’ve gotten extra training in order to babysit a friend’s epileptic 5 year old, giving my friend much needed hours of relief.
  • I have watched carefully and learned alongside my sister while she raises a child with cerebral palsy.
  • And I’m a trained foster care provider. I’ve seen my share of behavioral issues!

What I’m saying is that the next time a friend asks you to join her in a local “biggest loser” workout group, say YES and be grateful for the motivation — instead of peeking at her scale!

And the next time the mom-next-door complains about her sons’ funny obsession with red crayons, instead of lashing out that she should be grateful that her kid is advanced enough to know his colors, take a step back and remember that every mom is working through all the ups and downs of their own kid’s peculiarities the same as you are. 

Have you had conversations like this? Do you have a hard time NOT comparing your child’s achievements to others?

And you can totally come work out with me. I’ll be at the gym at 8:45 a.m. After all, those last ten pounds are NOT walking off on their own!




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The Kids Are Back To School and Mom is Back To The Gym!

It’s 8 a.m., and the kids are all backpacked and out the door. I enjoy the quiet of that moment every single weekday.

Don’t get me wrong—massive crazy happens between 6:30 and 8 a.m.! But … we are slowly taking control of our morning routine (we are, I swear!). However, the after school rat race with one freshman and two active elementary kids apparently isn’t going to be tamed anytime soon because the beast changes every week!


I’m staging “Operation: Take Back my Mornings!”


I could hang around enjoying a hot cocoa, schedule a pedicure with a friend, or even get busy and make those East Coast phone calls I’m behind on. Nope. Not me.


Now that the kids are back to school, MOM is Back to the Gym!


I saw this bumper sticker the other day: “A Fit Mom is a Powerful Mom.” And I totally agree. Only I haven’t been fit or powerful or even able to walk up my stairs without huffing and puffing for months! I’m ready to get my powers back. I’m not about losing a bunch of pounds; I’m about defeating those dang STAIRS. Plus it helps tremendously that I have a good friend who is even more motivated to fire up her mom-fierce. I highly suggest finding a walking buddy, a gym treadmill friend or even an online group that will give you motivation or competition or whatever gets your blood pumping.


When I don’t have a chatty friend to make the minutes less boring, my new favorite Pandora station is “I Will Survive” … and I dare you to listen to that song and NOT crank the dial up to a fast walk or (ack!) even a jog! The other songs that magically appear are so fabulously disco that you can’t help but smile and keep walking (yes, I’m the one on the corner elliptical doing the hand signals to YMCA; don’t judge me).


Another favorite treadmill pastime is to download library books on my phone or MP3 player. Lately the best ones I’ve listened to are:


“The Help” — Kathryn Stockett (Oh.My.Wonderful.Book. Worth the movie—but DON’T miss the book!)


“Cutting For Stone”— Abraham Verghese (If you haven’t read this I feel very sad for you. My mostest favorite book in 2010)


“Hell Gate”— Linda Fairstein (This was a brain candy type of whodoneit, but I loved the voices of the narrator.)


Audio books and your favorite tunes are also great for getting your groove on while cleaning the house. I’ve been known to work up a sweat while dancing with my vacuum cleaner!


Come on, Moms, while those kids are at school get your powerful back! Pedicures can wait; I say a fit mom is a happy mom, and happy moms will raise happy children.



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Carissa Rogers Joins SchoolFamily as GoodNCrazy Mom!

At SchoolFamily.com, we are thrilled to introduce readers to our newest blogger, Carissa Rogers, who will be blogging here as GoodNCrazy Mom. An experienced writer in the blogosphere, Carissa has a devoted following at her personal blog, GoodNCrazy, where she writes about what's on her mind, what's going on with her three kids (pictured here with their mom), and the wonderful crazy world of parenting. Here, she'll be doing much of the same, though adding the world of school into the mix. Feel free to drop Carissa a note (contacts are below in her post) and welcome her to SchoolFamily.com!

— Carol Brooks Ball, editor, SchoolFamily.com


I am super excited to join the SchoolFamily.com team.  

I’ll be sharing all the good and crazy in my world; including all the ups and downs of parenting 3 kids in 2 different public schools.

I live in southern Oregon. 

Where the town is tiny and the air is clean.

The Fighter Jets Train and the Ducks Reign.
Where Good is Crazy & Crazy is Good.

I’m a Mom of all trades… Jack of NONE.

About my 3 GoodNCrazy kids:

* My oldest daughter is 13. She’s a freshman. And already ‘borrows’ my shoes! She’s in multiple honors classes, plays the clarinet in marching band, tried out for her first school play and still has piano, church youth group and duties at home. —Oh, and having a near 14 year old around means we have a built-in babysitter once a week. (Yay for us!)

Be prepared to hear me whine at least once or twice about the fact that I have just begun 10 years of this thing called HIGH SCHOOL

* My middle child is a very creative 10 year old girl. She is my uber determined child; I’m talking Tenacious with a capitol T! When she decided to ride a bike sans training wheels she simply marched outside and taught herself. 

She’s in the fifth grade and is an advanced student with oh so many girlfriends. Yes, that means...all the joys and nightmares of 5th grade ‘girl drama’! She’s most excited right now about three things: (1) starting band (I choose the FLUTE! Mom!) (2) passing off her nine times tables and (3) running for vice president of her whole elementary. (Let the drama begin!)

* My youngest is a little boy. He’s 7 years old and in the 2nd grade. He is obsessed with science and engineering. I’m not kidding—we’ve checked out every single ‘project’ book in the local library. 

With two older sisters, imagine how delightful it is to have an all-boy; who’s purely oblivious to all the drama! This year he has found his ‘social’ gene. And while he loves school and learning he is all about recess and the ‘ball’ games his friends make up on the spot. “Mom can I have a play date today?” Repeated over and over is apparently going to be the theme for his year. 

I have one GoodNCrazy husband. He’s an attorney who loves Halloween and is an excellent foot warmer. He generally makes me laugh till I cry on a daily basis. Best of all, he’s a great dad in all the right ways. 

When I’m not busy shuffling kids to and fro: 

In my former life I was a molecular biologist. In my current stay-at-home life I am the chief researcher of parenting dos (and some don’ts), I love experimenting with new recipes and for spice I pretend to be a photographer… 

In my work-at-home life I write and consult for several websites as well as play around with this thing called ‘Social Media’ (you can call me @CarissaRogers on Twitter!). I started my personal GoodNCrazy.com blog in February of 2008.

In my volunteer life I have sported many school roles including: PTO Vice President, helped run fundraisers, class parties, class social studies days, rummage sales, read-a-thons and all sorts of other ‘thons’!  This year I plan to step away from being Marge-In-Charge and focus instead on being a good soldier-volunteer mom. (Tell me what needs doing, and I’ll be your girl.) I also volunteer on a regular basis with my church. And new this year… I am the Den Leader for our scouting group! 

Feel free to email me at carissa at goodncrazy dot com or leave me a comment below, I’d love to connect about SchoolFamily topics!

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Do you allow your children to watch TV or play on the computer before doing their homework?

Yes - 31.6%
Sometimes - 25.4%
No - 37.4%

Total votes: 4919
The voting for this poll has ended on: June 25, 2016