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My daughter had a "turtle chart" at school. Each time she went all day without some sort of a meltdown she got to color in a turtle. It worked! Took her a few weeks of coming home with only 4 turtles colored in. We asked her, what happened on Wednesday and she told us, etc. This effectively extinguished the behavior in about 4 weeks. Yeah!
You may want to try a behavior modification chart...commonly called a "star chart" in school classrooms. The basic concept is simple: Place a chart on the refrigerator and share with the child that the chart is to keep track of the desired behavior (i.e. making bed without being asked, cleaning room without an argument etc...). Each time the child performs the task correctly, the child gets a star. Amass enough stars, get a reward!
Here is a link with other links to great behavioral charts:
http://childparenting.about.com/cs/behaviorproblems/a/behaviormod.htm
